


Constellations

by jedimonkeyspock



Series: Cosmos 'verse [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Kid Fic, M/M, Mpreg, Raising Harry, Slash
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-23
Updated: 2015-06-28
Packaged: 2018-02-14 10:04:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2187636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jedimonkeyspock/pseuds/jedimonkeyspock
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sequel to Moon Rise, still struggling to adjust to family life and the unbelievable notion of freedom, Sirius finds himself confronted with undeniable guilt when faced with raising his daughter and godson, both victims of his choices that night in 1981.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue & Chapter 1: A Daring  Rescue

**Author's Note:**

> I'm in the process of editing the beginning chapters (that were written about 3 years ago) and picking up the story where I left off. Updates will most likely be sporadic as I'm currently working on several other projects. Please bear with me on this, I'm trying to get back into the groove of writing :)

Prologue:  
Sirius Black loved his family, no doubt about it- despite the fact that he was still getting used to having said family-one minute he was being released from Azkaban with a pat on the back and “sorry for the misunderstanding” (three and a half years is more than a ‘misunderstanding’, thank you very much) and the next he’s moving into Andromeda’s house with his lover and their daughter. And he loved his little daughter very much; she was a bit like Remus in some ways but there was no doubt she was Sirius’ spawn. And that was the problem really.  
Dani reminded Sirius of himself as a child, so much so that he was beginning to realize why his parents had so little patience with him. The main reason Sirius got into so much trouble at school was because he couldn’t do anything at home. By the time he’d started Hogwarts he had been squashed into a little velvet lined box and was just begging to explode.  
Thinking back at his childhood made Sirius even more determined not to force his daughter into a box or a cage. And even though he had a headache from sleeping poorly after being up arguing with Remus the night before, and all he’d really wanted was a few solid hours sleep and maybe a hot shower when he got up, Sirius sat and listened patiently to the three year old chattering away at the breakfast table.  
“What’s that daddy?”  
“That’s a tattoo love.”  
Dani frowned at the unfamiliar word; head leaning to one side like Remus’ did when he was thinking about something.  
“What’s it for?”  
“It’s art that goes on your body.”  
The little girl blinked impossibly large amber eyes at him from her booster seat to the right of him at the small, round table.  
“Why?”  
Sirius floundered for a reason that would appease the curious child and shot a murderous look at Andromeda when she snorted at him from where she was standing over the muggle toaster.  
“Well Dani, sometimes people have something they want to say but can’t put it in words so they turn it into pictures that they wear.”  
Dani nodded slowly, thinking over what he had said.  
“What’s that one mean daddy?”  
Sirius looked down to where her tiny finger was indicating a small tattoo on the inside of his right wrist. Resting the back of his large hand on the table Sirius smiled when Dani traced her finger along the black outline of an infinity symbol over a full moon.  
Looking up from his arm Sirius managed to catch Remus’ eyes for the first time that day. He smiled tentatively at his lover before answering the little girl’s question.  
“That’s a very special one love; it means that I love your papa forever.”  
Even though he spoke to Dani, Sirius’ gaze never left Remus’ and his words were clearly meant for him. Remus nodded slightly, accepting the round-about apology and stepped into the hall, subtly motioning for Sirius to follow. Smiling brightly Sirius kissed Dani on the forehead and followed his lover out of the kitchen.  
Chuckling softly to herself Andromeda placed a plate of cut up toast in front of her three year old cousin.  
“Eat your breakfast Dani and I’ll let you help me in the garden.”  
The little girl grinned, showing off a mouthful of baby teeth and stopped smearing her smashed banana around her plate with a piece of toast long enough to take a large bite. Chewing slowly, Dani took another large bite and a long gulp of juice before pausing to look at the older woman.  
“Dromeda what bout daddy an papa? Can they help garden too?”  
Andromeda chuckled again and wiped crumbs off the child’s face with a gentle hand before replying with a glint in her eye,  
“I think your daddies will be a bit busy Dani, but maybe later you can show Sirius your flower garden?”  
Dani nodded, that sounded good to her. She’d much rather help Dromeda in the garden then wait around for daddy and papa to get done doin’ growed up stuff. Whatever that stuff was couldn’t be better than mud pies and worms.  
***  
Sirius ran his tongue across Remus’ mouth, forestalling his lover from finishing his sentence. Displeased with the subtle order to shut up, Remus nipped the other man’s lower lip not so gently.  
“Siri- please just listen! I know you don’t think you’re ready for this, but you’ve been doing a great job with Dani and Harry needs us. He needs you, you’re his godfather.”  
Pulling back suddenly, Sirius searched his lovers sparkling brown eyes and tired face,  
“Hey, you’re just as much Harry’s god-dad as I am Moons, you know James and Lily would’ve- they’d have put you as godfather too if they could.”

“I know, but that’s not even the point Padfoot. It’s the right thing to do, no more waiting. If you had seen them, Lily’s family- they’re the worst sort of muggle, and they don’t care for Harry at all. He deserves better than that. We of all people should know-“  
He was cut off by a sloppy kiss. When Sirius pulled back from it he was smiling shyly; uncertainly.  
“I know Moons, you’re right- *kiss*- and I agree with you completely- *longer kiss*- and I’m ready. We’re ready.”

 

Chapter One: A Daring Rescue  
Harry perched uncomfortably on the camp bed in his room under the stairwell. He pressed his ear to the wall and tried in vain to listen in to Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon in the sitting room. The groaning creak over his head told him that Dudley was on the stairs listening in as well.  
The bell sounded and Harry tensed when Uncle Vernon’s loud footsteps thundered past him room and down the entry hall. The door had barely creaked open on its damp hinges when Uncle Vernon gasped out a strangled sounding,  
“YOU!”  
***  
Today was the day, Sirius thought anxiously, the day they would go and pick up Harry. Fidgeting nervously he snuck a glance at the clock. Dumbledore had said to meet him exactly at noon, it was five till.  
He was excited and terrified. Odds were the child wouldn’t remember him, but what if he did? What if he wanted to know where he had been for the last three and half years? What if Harry didn’t like him? What if he didn’t want to come live with them? What if-  
His runaway train of thoughts was interrupted by Remus’ voice in his ear.  
“Padfoot, you’re thinking too loudly. Sickle for them.”  
“I’m worried about Harry, Moony. What if he doesn’t like us? What if he and Dani don’t get on? What-”  
Remus held a long finger to Sirius’ lips, forestalling any further questions from escaping.  
“Sirius stop. You’re borrowing trouble. I’m sure Harry will love you, and I’m sure he and Dani will get along just fine. They’re the second generation of Marauders after all.”  
Fears temporarily assuaged, Sirius let himself be dragged off to join Andromeda and Ted in the kitchen. Despite having lost contact with them well before his imprisonment- sometime after she had been blasted off the family tapestry- he was pleased to discover that they got on as well as ever. The older couple provided a sense of stability he so desperately needed after his horrible ordeal in Azkaban.  
The next three minutes seemed like an eternity but the next thing Sirius knew he was stepping out of the floo into Mrs. Figg’s house, followed closely by Remus. Albus was already there, casually dressed in a muggle suit and having a cup of tea with Arabella in the parlor. He absently stroked one of her many cats, a long haired, grey tabby that was seated quite comfortably on his lap. Seeing them, the ancient wizard rose with surprising grace and greeted them warmly. Pleasantries over with, Albus set down his empty tea cup and bid a fond farewell to Arabella, leading the anxious lovers out the door and down the street to Number 4 Privet Drive.  
Standing on the front step Sirius was less than impressed by the ordinary house lost in a sea of identical homes, each screaming ‘muggle’. Dumbledore briskly rang the bell and spared a reassuring smile for his nervous companions. Remus smiled back politely but Sirius was too tense; rocking forward to the balls of his feet, then back to his heels, his shoes making a dull ‘thud’ against the wet concrete.  
Both men were lost in their own thoughts; Sirius’ mind was running circles, consumed with his worry about Harry. Remus found himself wondering what the Dursley’s would say and do when they took Harry. Would they fight it? Would they be relieved? Would they even remember them? The last time they had seen Lily’s sister was at hers and James’ wedding…  
Presently the door was opened by a heavy set man, whom Sirius recognized at Vernon Dursley. Vernon narrowed his beady blue eyes when he saw the mismatched trio and moved so his large body blocked entry to the house.  
“You!”  
He spat viciously, jowls wobbling comically as he spoke.  
“I thought I told your lot to keep well away! We’ll have none of your sort here. Weird and unnatural the lot of you!”  
Sirius bristled at his comments but Remus placed a restraining hand on his shoulder. Vernon followed the movement and his eyes narrowed to thin slits. But whatever he had planned to say was cut off by Petunia arriving at the door behind him.  
“Vernon who’s at the- YOU! Murderer! Stay away from us!”  
She screeched hysterically, pointing a bony finger at Sirius, her head swinging back and forth on her long neck like a door on broken hinges.  
‘I guess it’s safe to say they remember us, or Sirius at least.’ Remus thought wryly, although her reaction had left him wary and on edge.  
Any further exclamation was cut off by the steady timbre of Dumbledore.  
“Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, there is no need for alarm. If you will allow us to step inside all will be explained, but this is not something to discuss on the front steps.”  
Very reluctantly Vernon stepped aside to allow the Wizards to enter his home, fearing that if he didn’t they’d just sit on his front stoop and then what would the neighbors say?  
***  
As Dumbledore seated himself in the Dursley’s lounge and proceeded to explain the situation, Sirius glanced around the sterile environment. Family photos lined the walls in neat rows, but none of them he noted, included Harry. There were also no pictures of James or even Lily to be found. Frowning, his sharp grey eyes took in the rest of his surroundings.  
The home was very neat and tidy; nothing to suggest a small child lived there, let alone two.  
Vernon’s booming voice brought him back to the moment and he focused on the scene in front of him. Petunia looked very pale, and by contrast Vernon looked very red in the face; so much so that he resembled an over ripe tomato.  
Before his tirade on troublesome boys and meddling wizards—the last words came out as an awkward, choked noise—could go any further he was interrupted by Remus’ deceptively soft voice.  
“In that case, Mr. Dursley, I’m sure you’ll be relieved to have all of us out of your hair. If you would kindly tell us where Harry is we’ll get him and be on our way very shortly.”  
***  
It was a very tight lipped Petunia that led the men to the hall and with a nervous glance at a clearly angry Sirius, unlocked the door to the cupboard under the stairs. Sunlight from the large, spotless window illuminated the small space in fat shafts of dusty, still light. An unruly tuft of jet black hair was the only visible part of the tiny boy, curled under a blanket on the small cot. Only the slight trembling of his body beneath the blanket showed that he was awake.  
“He sleeps in a cupboard?”  
Sirius raged, turning to face the deathly white Petunia and bright red Vernon. Unable to think of an insult worthy of the pair, Sirius turned back toward the small closet, shoulders shaking with suppressed anger.  
Remus had knelt beside the cot and placed a gentle hand on the frightened boy’s shoulder, softly calling his name.  
“Harry? It’s alright Harry we won’t hurt you, can you look at me please?”  
***  
Sniffling softly, Harry peeked out from beneath hi s ragged blue blanket. The minute he’d heard Uncle Vernon raise his voice he’d quickly hidden beneath his blankets, hoping against all hope to avoid detection. His little heart sank though, when he heard his name and figured the teachers from playgroup had held true to their threat of talking to his Aunt and Uncle.  
He hadn’t meant to spill red paint on that little girl, and it wasn’t his fault that every time the teacher wiped it up it reappeared on the little girl’s dress and hair…  
“Harry?”  
The soft voice called his name again and Harry moved the blanket down off his face, trying to look brave while curled into a miserable ball on his tiny bed.  
“There you are.”  
The voice said again, it was warm and welcoming; it sounded like home and family, Harry thought, it sounded like love. The mysterious man smiled and continued speaking,  
“We—Padfoot and I—have come to take you home, if you want to come that is.”  
As he spoke, the gentle voiced man gestured to his companion, a tall, regal looking man with jet black hair- like Harry’s own- and a funny sadness in his eyes behind the sparkle.  
Blinking his impossibly green eyes, blurred and burning with unshed tears, Harry cocked his head to the side inquisitively.  
“Home? With you?”  
Remus smiled and nodded.  
“If you want. Padfoot—Sirius—and I were best friends of your parents. Sirius is your godfather Harry, and we’d very much like you to come and live with us.”  
Sirius knelt beside Remus and smiled reassuringly at the shy little boy.  
“That’s right Harry. Your dad was like a brother to me. If anything happened to him he wanted me to look after you. I’ve been—away—but now that I’m back we want to take you home.”  
Harry looked curiously between the two men before asking tentatively,  
“You- you want me?”  
Sirius and Remus exchanged an incredulous look.  
“Of course we want you Harry. We love you, ever since you were born. Moony—err, Remus—and I used to babysit you all the time. We would’ve come for you sooner but-”  
Sirius was cut off by the messy haired boy launching himself into his arms. His words were muffled by Sirius’ shoulder but the dark haired man managed to make out;  
“I want to go home with you.”  
***  
Holding tight to Sirius’ neck as they crossed the street, Harry couldn’t help but think what a daring rescue this was, with Mr. Remus and Mr. Padfoot as the brave heroes. His last thought as he and Sirius stepped into the fireplace at Mrs. Figg’s, was of how cool it was and wouldn’t Dudley be mad be was missing this!


	2. Chapter Two: Take Your Hat off and Stay Awhile

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry comes home.

Chapter Two: Take Your Hat off and Stay Awhile  
  
***  
Harry looked around the homey kitchen with wide, saucer-like green eyes, still in somewhat of a daze from travelling through the floo. Part of him wished someone would pinch him, to prove that he hadn’t dreamed all this up.  
Glancing around to check that no one was looking, he quickly pinched himself on the wrist. It stung, and satisfied this was all somehow real, Harry took another bite from the chocolate biscuit Mr. Moony had given him.  
The kitchen was bigger than Aunt Petunias, but it was warm and cozy with colorful throw rugs and homemade tea towels where hers had been white and bare. There was a funny clock with extra hands hanging on the wall opposite the window. Underneath it were several framed photographs.  
Harry blinked three times in rapid succession, suddenly wondering again if he were indeed dreaming when the people in the photographs waved brightly at him. Startled, he leaned back, nearly toppling off the high wood bench that had been pulled up to the medium sized, square table.  
Righting himself quickly he listened carefully to the hum of voices from the sitting room as he glanced around the room, taking in the large windows with colorful curtains and the gleaming stone countertops. Aunt Petunia would call it ‘old fashioned’ but Harry thought it was brilliant, very tidy and welcoming at the same time.  
Straining his ears, Harry heard some shuffling and the hum of voices grew louder as they drew closer. Harry held his breath for three counts before the door to the kitchen creaked softly open, allowing the grownups entrance.  
Mr. Padfoot looked worried, his eyes were drawn and tired as he talked to the nice looking lady beside him, Harry couldn’t remember her name but he knew this was her house, which meant this was her kitchen, and in Harry’s mind that made her alright. Mr. Moony smiled at him and crossed to sit next to him on the bench.  
“How’re you doin’ Harry? Alright?”  
Harry nodded, eyes wide and cautious. He carefully studied the man sitting next to him in the soft light of late afternoon that streamed through the cheery, clean windows in thick bands of gold. He wasn’t as old as Uncle Vernon and he wasn’t nearly as fat. He was kind of scrawny, as Aunt Petunia would say, just like Harry was himself. Mr. Moony smiled under Harry’s scrutiny, eyes crinkling around the edges, and the boy had the good graces to blush as being caught staring.  
But Mr. Moony didn’t seem to mind so Harry kept looking. He wasn’t a very tall man, even when he was standing up, but Harry could tell that he was strong. His face was tired, and he had three thin scars across his jaw that Harry was careful not to stare at, but his eyes sparkled a bright amber as they reflected the sun. He had very old, but very kind eyes, Harry decided, and he smiled up at the fair haired man, displaying two rows of perfect baby teeth.  
A warm hand came to rest on his shoulder and Harry startled, craning his head to look up at Mr. Padfoot who had crossed the room to stand behind him. When he smiled Harry could see it more in the man’s eyes than his mouth which wobbled a bit in the corners like it wasn’t used to curving up instead of down.  
Even so he seemed to be a kind man as well, his grey eyes held a hint of subdued mischief that reminded Harry of a look Dudley would sometimes get, right before he did something naughty.  
“Alright there Harry?”  
Harry smiled at the familiar question.  
“Yes Mr. Padfoot, I’m ok.”  
Sirius couldn’t stop the chuckle that bubbled up from his chest,  
“You don’t have to call me Mr. Padfoot Harry, Padfoot or Sirius is fine.”  
“Alright M- Padfoot. Is it alright to call you Moony then?”  
At Remus’ nod Harry smiled timidly and turned to the pretty lady standing by the window.  
“What do I call you?”  
Andromeda smiled at the little boy and crossed to kneel in front of him.  
“You may call me Cousin Dromeda, Harry, if that’s alright with you?”  
When he nodded solemnly she chuckled softly and reached a maternal hand to smooth his wild hair.  
“Would you like some juice Harry?”  
“Yes please Cousin Dromeda.”  
Sighing tiredly, Sirius took a seat across from Remus, reaching across the smooth surface to grasp the other man’s hand.  
“Do you have any questions Harry? We should get them out of the way before Ted gets back with the girls and this place turns back into a madhouse.”  
Harry’s eyebrows disappeared into his unruly hair and Sirius realized he could have worded that better. Luckily Remus was there to back him up, just like always.  
“He doesn’t really mean a mad house, Harry, Cousin Dromeda’s husband, Ted, is out with his daughter- your cousin Dora, she’s eleven—and our daughter, your cousin Dani, she’s just a little bit younger than you. When they get back from shopping things are likely to get very noisy, very fast.”  
Looking relieved at the news that the house wasn’t going to be taken over by crazy people, possibly in clown masks, if that movie Dudley watched when Aunt Petunia wasn’t home was anything to go by, Harry smiled and relaxed in his seat, taking a careful sip of juice.  
“So, do you have anything you’d like to ask us Harry?”  
Harry nodded, thinking about what he wanted to ask. He settled on what he figured was most important.  
“Did you really know my parents? What were they like?”  
Remus and Sirius shared a look that Harry didn’t understand, and Padfoot’s voice was weak and shaky when he replied.  
“James and Lily… your parents, Harry, they were amazing people. Your father was a fantastic Quidditch player, but he was also a very good Auror. And your mum, she was an amazing witch.”  
At Harry’s confused look Remus gently interrupted his lover.  
“Harry, what do you know about Magic?”  
“Magic isn’t real, Uncle Vernon said so.”  
He said quietly, not entirely sure of that fact since really, Uncle Vernon didn’t know everything.  
“Not real? Not real?”  
Sirius spluttered indignantly and Harry feared he had said something wrong. Sensing his unease, Remus laid a calming hand on the boy’s back and smiled gently at him.  
“Harry, how do you think we got here? To Cousin Dromeda’s house so quickly?”  
Harry shrugged, not really understanding the question.  
“Dudley told me all about elevators; he said he got to ride in one when he visited Uncle Vernon at work. It’s like a little room and when you step in it, it takes you somewhere else.”  
Andromeda laughed softly from her perch on the low windowsill.  
“That’s a very good analogy Harry.”  
Smiling uncertainly Harry turned toward her,  
“What’s an analogy?”  
“It’s like an example Harry.”  
Remus said, drawing the boy’s attention back to himself.  
“We didn’t come here in an elevator Harry; we traveled through the floo network. The floo network is one way for people to move about in the Wizarding World. Another is apparation but we won’t worry about that now. Harry, did your Aunt and Uncle ever tell you anything about your parents?”  
“Just that they died when I was very small. Uncle Vernon said my dad was drunk, and that’s why he crashed the car. But that’s not true is it?”  
There was a pleading note to his voice as he so desperately hoped it wasn’t true.  
Shaking his head Sirius cut into the conversation, focusing on keeping his voice even despite the anger he was feeling toward Vernon and Petunia Dursley.  
“No Harry, that’s not true at all. We’re going to tell you a story, and parts of it might seem a little crazy, or difficult to understand, but I just want you to listen ok, you can ask us questions at the end.”  
Nodding seriously, Harry settled in to listen.  
***  
“So magic is real. People who can do magic are witches and wizards, like my parents and all of you, and people who can’t are muggles?”  
Remus smiled and nodded in affirmation.  
“That’s right Harry.”  
“And, my mum and dad, they were heroes and fought bad guys?”  
This time it was Sirius, who answered,  
“Yes Harry, they were. And they loved you very much. They did everything they could to keep you safe, even at cost to themselves.”  
Harry nodded, that made him feel a little bit better, knowing that they loved him and that his dad was a hero, not a drunk.  
“Do you- do you have any pictures of them? I don’t know what they look like.”  
Remus stood slowly, his knees creaking as he got up,  
“Sure do Harry, I’ll go get them for you.”  
Smiling in thanks, Harry turned back to Sirius,  
“What keeps the Wizarding World away from the Muggle World? How come nobody knows about it?”  
Sirius took a moment to think about the question before he answered, he had to keep reminding himself that while Harry was smart- definitely inherited Lily’s brains- he was still only four and half, and Sirius needed to use words he would understand.  
“There’s a set of rules first off, to keep everyone safe. And then there’s sort of Magic policemen who make sure that people follow the rules, and help us stay hidden. The rest of the world doesn’t understand Magic, Harry, and that makes them afraid. So we do our best to leave them alone and not frighten them. Do you understand?”  
Harry nodded slowly,  
“I think so. Do you think I’ll be a Wizard too? Like my dad and you and Moony?”  
“I have no doubt kiddo, I can already see that you’ve got your mum’s brain, and she was a very powerful witch. Your dad wasn’t half bad either. You look just like him you know, but you’ve got your mum’s eyes.”  
The door to the kitchen swung open and Remus reappeared clutching a box of photographs which he placed carefully in front of Harry.  
“Here you go love, shall we look through them together?”  
Overwhelmed, Harry simply nodded, eager to finally see what his parents looked like, he got up on his knees and leaned excitedly over the table.  
Remus shuffled quickly through the photos until he found one of James and Lily at graduation. He laid it on the table, followed by several snaps of them at their wedding and a few of them with baby Harry.  
Small trembling fingers reached tentatively for the moving photographs, tracing reverently along the lines of their faces as they turned toward each other and shared a tender kiss before turning back toward the photographer with a smile.  
Carefully arranging all the photos edge to edge Harry looked longingly at the smiling faces; his mum had fiery red hair and green eyes just like his, and his dad had crazy black hair that didn’t lay flat, just like his and a dimple when he smiled, just like he did too.  
Moony’s soft voice washed over him,  
“You can keep those, if you’d like.”  
“Yes please. Thanks.”  
The kitchen was enveloped in a comfortable quiet as Harry studied the pictures, occasionally asking a question but mostly just taking in every detail of his parents’ faces. It stayed that way for quite some time until the stillness was broken by a clatter and several voices from the sitting room that announced the return of Ted and the girls.  
Andromeda excused herself to greet them, and Remus followed suit. As the door from the sitting room swung open Harry could hear the excited shouts of who he assumed was his cousin Dani,  
“Is he here yet? Is he here yet?”  
Forcing his attention away from the magical, moving photographs Harry focused on the commotion in the next room. He could hear Remus’ soft chuckle and the sound a little girl giggling carry through the walls.  
“Yes, yes Dani-bug Harry’s here. He’s sitting in the kitchen with Daddy, now remember what we talked about, we have to give Harry some time and space to settle in, just like we gave Daddy, ok?”  
“Kay Papa! Can we go see him now? I gotted him a present in Die-gone Alley, see?!”*  
“Alright Cub, that’s very nice, inside voice please.”  
He gently scolded with a smile.  
Moments later the door from the sitting room opened and Remus reappeared holding a small, curly haired girl on his hip, followed by a man wearing an overlarge cloak and a young girl with bright pink hair pulled into messy pigtails.  
Suddenly uncharacteristically shy, Dani hid her face in the faded collar of Remus’ worn jacket as they neared the kitchen table. She peaked out from her papa’s shoulder with a timid smile and promptly hid her face back against the soft fabric of his coat. Remus smiled ruefully and spoke softly but clearly to the cautiously curious young boy,  
“Harry Potter, I would like to introduce you to Danika Lupin-Black, who’s being rather shy at the moment. She’s your cousin for all intents and purposes. And Dani, I would like to introduce you to Harry, he’s to be staying with us from now on so why don’t we make him feel welcome?”  
It took several moments but the tousled, raven haired little girl eventually turned to face the newcomer with a small, but welcoming smile.  
“Ello ‘Arry Potter. I hope you like it here. This’ for you.”  
That said the little girl clumsily thrust a medium small package in his direction.  
“Er, thanks Dani! I think I’ll like it here a lot.”  
Curiosity won over politeness and Harry didn’t wait for the other introductions to open his gift. It was a small dragon plush toy, its soft scales were a beautiful emerald green and the dragon’s eyes were a sparkling amber, lit like dancing flame. Excitedly Harry clutched the toy to his chest, emitting a startled gasp when smoke rose in curling tendrils from the dragon’s nostrils.  
Both children giggled delightedly when the toy gently rustled its wings and exhaled another stream of smoke.  
Dora stepped forward fearlessly, her own excitement impeding her manners and reached out to point to the dragon’s unfurling wings.  
“It really flies if you want it to, short distances anyway, the man at the toy shop said it reacts to thoughts and feelings. It does a lot of other neat things too but I’ll let them be a surprise. I’m Dora Tonks by the way, your cousin and this is my dad Ted. I guess you’ve already met me mum.”  
Not sure what to say Harry simply nodded, hugging the dragon tighter and smiling when it emitted a low, rumbling purr. After suffering a few minutes more of introductions, the kids went off to the sitting room to play with Harry’s dragon, leaving the adults to discuss grown up matters in the kitchen.  
Aware that the parents needed to talk, Dora took it upon herself to entertain the smaller kids, helping Harry think the dragon into gliding around the room and making them laugh by showing them funny faces and making her hair change colors.  
***  
Sitting around the table in a calm silence the adults listened to the noise from the other room with faint smiles on their weary faces. Another burst of giggles and scattered clapping and Dani’s voice could be heard demanding Dora do the duck face again and change her hair to green to match the dragon.  
Sirius and Remus shared a tired grin, perhaps everything would be alright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I was a kid, my best friend's dad would always tease me about constantly wearing hats. He'd tell me at least once a week, "take your hat off and stay awhile".
> 
> *I know this is spelled wrong, I wanted to emphasize her mispronunciation- she’s only three and half years old after all.


	3. Nightmares

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nightmares and arguments.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've decided to try to make Monday the update day. Chapters 4&5 have been written and just need editing. I'm hoping to finish through chapter 7 by next Monday... we shall see. :)

**Chapter three: Nightmares**

Harry startled awake, gasping into the darkened room, heart pounding in his ears as he waited for his eyes to adjust to the dim lighting.

_Just a dream. It was just a bad dream… wha-_

Eyes finally adjusted, Harry looked about the room in surprise, momentarily wondering where he was before the memories of the previous day came crashing back. Just across the moderately sized room, lit by a strange- magical- hovering lamp that cast colorful stars on the ceiling, on a bed that matched his own, lay a little girl. She was fast asleep, her black hair lay in tangles on the pillow and she was curled tightly around a stuffed animal- Harry couldn’t make out the shape in the dim light cast by the star lamp.

This was his cousin, Dani, and he was in her room at the Tonks’ house. Mr. Moony and Mr. Padfoot had brought him to their home with magic after rescuing him from Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon. Harry idly wondered what Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon thought about him leaving—he’d not even said goodbye to Dudley—before dismissing the thought when a curl of smoke floated past his peripheral vision.

His dragon! Smiling suddenly Harry dug though the blankets and unearthed his new toy- a present from Dani. Hugging it to his chest, he lay back in bed and watched the patterns from the lamp on the ceiling. It was very late, or very early and Harry doubted they would approve of him getting up. Uncle Vernon never did—that’s why he put a lock on the cupboard door—so he concentrated on the colorful patterns of stars, trying to forget the bad dream that had woken him in the first place.

Suddenly he remembered the other gift he had been given: the magical pictures of his parents he’d tucked safely under his pillow. Eager little fingers closed around the glossy edges as he drew them out, squinting at them in the darkness. Wishing he had more light to see them by, he nearly fell out of bed when the hovering lamp floated closer, casting a cheery glow across the photos.

His mum and dad smiled and waved at him and Harry couldn’t help grinning and waving back. Studying the cherished pictures closely, Harry didn’t notice the large black dog that crept quietly into the room, snuffing at the foot of Dani’s bed it gave a satisfied huff and prowled toward Harry. Sensing movement in front of him Harry looked up from the pictures, barely stifling a scream when he found himself eye to eye with a large, terrifying, black dog.

Squeaking in fright, Harry pulled the covers over his head and curled around his dragon, eyes squeezed tightly shut. There was a small weight pressed to the mattress beside him and Harry chanced a peek from his safe cocoon. The dog had laid his enormous shaggy head on the mattress and was looking at him with soulful grey eyes. Tentatively reaching a hand out from the covers, Harry giggled quietly when the dog nuzzled his fingers with a wet nose before promptly licking his outstretched hand.

Throwing the covers off, Harry sat up and stared at the magnificent beast. He was almost entirely shadow in the soft glow of the nightlight but his grey eyes glittered with intelligence and the pink tongue lolling to the side as he quietly panted, belayed Harry’s fears. Boldly, he reached out to scratch the large creature behind the ears, laughing in surprise when the dog jumped onto his bed and settled beside him. With one arm wrapped tightly around his dragon, the other stretched to pet the surprisingly soft fur of the mangy looking dog, Harry fell back asleep watching the stars shift and change, head resting above the smiling faces of his parents where they were tucked safely back under his pillow.

***

Sirius gasped, suddenly alert and covered in a cold sweat; glancing quickly at Remus he noted with relief that the other man was still asleep. He’d never admit it of course, but all the stuff with Harry and James’ awful in-laws had wiped out what little energy the werewolf had left.

Slipping from the bed Sirius seamlessly shifted to his animagus form and padded silently from the room. Rationally he knew that he was safe; there were no Dementors lurking in the shadows of Andromeda’s house, but since when was fear rational? The large dog snuffled and shook his wild coat as if trying to shake the nightmare and walked off down the hall to the kids’ room.

The lamp Remus had charmed to hover by Dani’s bed cast a colorful array of stars on the ceiling, bathing the room in a cheery glow. Satisfied that the cub was sleeping soundly Sirius padded toward his godson who was sitting up, looking at the photos Remus had given him earlier. The little boy glanced up and startled, squeaking like a frightened mouse before hiding under the covers.

Amused by his reaction, Sirius remembered a little too late that his animagus form was for all intents and purposes a frightening Grimm. Whining softly he rested his muzzle on the bed and waited. The blankets shifted and two emerald green eyes peeked from beneath them. Whuffing quietly Sirius nuzzled the small hand that reached tentatively toward him, were he in human form he would have grinned at the child’s easy acceptance, before leaping onto the bed to lay next to him.

Even in the dim light his sharp canine eyes could detect Harry’s strong resemblance to James. From the wild black hair to his dimpled grin he was a mini-Prongs, except for the eyes. The eyes were pure Lily; not just the color but the love and openness that shone out from them, masked by just the right amount of mischief.

With a very human sigh, the dog settled down next to the boy and slept.

***

Remus wasn’t surprised when we woke to a cold, empty bed, nor was he surprised to see Padfoot in his animagus form fast asleep in Dani’s room. He didn’t think Sirius had managed to sleep through the night once since his return. Not that he could blame him really, he’d had his own fair share of nightmares—he just wished Sirius would talk to him about it. But as much as he wanted to press the matter, Remus knew from past experience that the only way to get Sirius to open up was to be patient and wait.

It was too bad patience wasn’t Remus’ strong suite.

***

Dani picked somewhat sullenly at her cereal from where she was sat in her booster seat at the kitchen table. This morning when she woke up, expecting what was now a routine for her—special cuddles with daddy as Padfoot—she had been disappointed to see the large black dog curled up asleep on Harry’s bed. Remembering what Papa told her about making Harry feel welcome, she tried her best to ignore the bad little troll tugging painfully on her heart.

The atmosphere in the kitchen was strangely subdued and lacking in the usual hustle and bustle of the unconventional family. Andromeda and Ted were eating their breakfast quietly, each reading a different section of the Daily Prophet while Dora absently ate her toast; much too busy writing a letter to one of her friends to engage in idle conversation.

Across from her Remus was idly stirring his tea, absently adding sugar until it was much too sweet to drink—even for him. Sirius was hovering anxiously by the sink, sipping coffee and checking that Harry liked his breakfast. He’d managed the first piece of toast alright but he was picking at the egg disinterestedly.

“The eggs aren’t too runny are they Harry? I could—err Remus could make some scrambled if you’d like that better.”

Dromeda and Ted shared an amused glance from behind their papers and Remus valiantly fought the urge to roll his eyes, settling for a slow exhale through his nose instead.

“No it’s fine, really, I like runny eggs. I’m just not very hungry. I’m sorry, I can try to finish it.”

Sirius could relate. He’d gotten the impression that the Dursley’s didn’t feed him much, and judging by the pictures he’d seen of their lad, Dudley, none of the missed food had gone to waste.

“That’s fine Harry, no need to stuff yourself”

He said comfortingly.

“What did you usually have for breakfast before?”

Sirius wondered if he should clarify that statement but Harry seemed to understand as he looked thoughtful for a moment before responding.

“I’d usually make eggs and toast, but Uncle Vernon liked bacon and sausages too.”

Remus paused in refilling his teacup,

“You mean you cooked breakfast for your Aunt and Uncle?”

Harry nodded innocently.

“Dudley too. He liked _marmite_ on his toast and eggs.”

Marmite was said with a shudder; apparently Harry didn’t care for the salty stuff any more than Remus did.

“I see. Your Aunt helped you cook breakfast?”

“No.”

Sirius and Remus shared a look over the little boy’s head, if Albus hadn’t forbidden them from visiting those awful Muggles again…

“Well maybe you can help me with breakfast sometimes Harry, if you’d like to that is.”

Harry smiled, feeling more assured of his place here. Cooking was something he was good at and it wasn’t too bad. What he really liked though was baking. Sometimes when his Aunt and Uncle took Dudley out they would leave him with Mrs. Figg and they’d make chocolate biscuits and Mrs. Figg would let him lick the spoon.

“I’d like that Mr—Moony. Maybe we could make biscuits for tea? I like to bake.”

Remus smiled encouragingly.

“Sounds like fun Harry, maybe later today yeah?”

Harry nodded enthusiastically and Remus turned his attention to his unusually quiet daughter.

“What do you say Dani? Shall you, me and Harry make biscuits this afternoon?”

Dani visibly perked up at being including in the conversation and offered a small smile.

“Can they be chocolate?”

***

Remus wiped his hands on a tea towel and with a flick of his wand sent it to the laundry room. The first batch of biscuits was in the oven and Andromeda was supervising the little ones as they happily licked batter off of two large spoons. Quickly accio-ing his camera he snapped several shots of the kids smiling, flower covered faces thinking Sirius would want to see them later. Sirius. Where was he?

With a tired sigh Remus went in search of his absent lover. He finally found him in the library along with a half empty bottle of firewhisky.

_Damnit Sirius!_

Sirius didn’t look up when Remus entered the room, but acknowledged his presence by raising the bottle in a silent salute.

Taking a deep breath, hoping to forestall his anger, Remus sat beside his mate and gently took the bottle from his hand.

“Sirius-“

He began slowly, but the bleary eyed man cut him off sharply.

“Don’t Remus. Just don’t.”

Fatigue and hurt won out over sensibility and Remus snapped. Standing quickly he turned toward his lover with a snarl.

“That’s the bloody problem with us isn’t it? You never fucking talk to me Sirius! It’s been weeks since you’ve come home and all you’ve said is ‘don’t’ or ‘not now Remus’. Bloody _when_ Sirius? You obviously need to talk to someone about this and it might as well be me!”

When Sirius didn’t respond or even look at him, Remus tried another tactic. Kneeling carefully on the ground in front of his lover he hesitantly reached out to rest a hand on his knee, stilling it from where it was jiggling nervously.

“Padfoot please, talk to me. I want to help, but I can’t if you won’t talk to me. Tell me what’s going on in that brilliant, muddled head of yours.”

Sirius inhaled shakily, fists clenching and unclenching as he struggled to contain his anger. Standing abruptly on unsteady feet he lurched to the side before tentatively regaining his balance he staggered a few steps toward the low fireplace. Staring blankly into the embers he tried to take deep even breaths, tried to calm down. His mind was whirling; thoughts pulling in five different directions at once.

Unshed tears pricked painfully at the backs of his eyes and his vision swam, the embers in the hearth glowed brightly in his blurred vision; sparking dangerous flames as his anger spiked. Waves of rage and hurt and despair crashed against him and the dam broke. Spinning violently he turned to find Remus in front of him, nose to nose. Angrily he shoved him, taking a bit of pleasure in the look of surprise on the smaller man’s face as he stumbled back—shoving down the niggling feeling of guilt.

“FUCK. OFF. REMUS!”

Stunned into silence Remus could only stare at his lover, but Sirius was on a roll now. A tidal storm of emotions had been released and he’d be damned to try and tap it back.

“Oh, you want me to talk about it? Do you want me tell you all about those horrendous _years_ spent in prison? In a dark and slimy cell with Dementors waiting ‘round the corner, knowing—knowing that all my friends were either dead or thought I was guilty? Knowing that I had no one! Knowing that I was responsible for James and Lily’s deaths?

“Yeah, I might not have been the one to hand them over to Voldemort on a silver platter, but I didn’t keep them safe either, did I? I was too much of a fucking coward to be their secret keeper and that got them killed!

“What do you want me to say Remus? What do you bloody want from me? I was rotting away in prison; I didn’t get to go their fucking funeral! I don’t even know if they _had_ a funeral! And while I was locked away, dying, you were here. You were here; doing Merlin knows what- raising _our_ daughter alone! I didn’t even fucking know I was father!

“And what about Harry? He was dumped on those deplorable muggles who didn’t even give him a proper bed, made him sleep in a fucking cupboard! How can I make up for that? How can I even begin to make that right? My godson was living under the fucking stairs, wearing hand-me-down clothes and being their fucking house elf! And my daughter- who I didn’t even know existed- she’s all grown. I never got to hold her, rock her to sleep and sing to her, see her take her first steps… I missed so much Moony. And I can’t—I can’t deal with this right now. I’m going out.”

He disappeared with a loud crack that resounded dully in the quiet room, leaving Remus alone in the dying light of the fire as tears streamed down his pale face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wasn't really happy with the way this chapter turned out- trying to edit something written 3 years ago without completely re-writing it is difficult so I ended up leaving it much the same *exasperated sigh*


	4. Apologies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius has some apologizing to do, but first there is snark and more arguing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I could not think of a proper chapter title, so I went the obvious route... meh

Chapter Four: Apologies

Sirius returned the next morning with a heavy heart and found the house to be unusually silent. A note on the kitchen table said that Dromeda and Ted had taken the children out for the day and for Remus to try and get some rest. Guilt sat like rough stones in his stomach as he re-read the note several times over. Glancing at the family clock he saw Remus was in the Library and hesitantly headed in that direction, wondering what he should say. What he could say.  
Drawing closer to the half-closed door he heard Remus’ soft voice followed by another that made him freeze mid-step. He’d know that voice anywhere—Severus Snape was in his home, alone, with his mate. Pausing just beyond the door, Sirius drew his wand and waited to hear what the slimy git was saying.  
“Come now Lupin, it can’t have been that bad.”  
Remus chuckled weakly and Sirius felt his heart stop at the achingly beautiful sound—how long since he’d heard Remus laugh? Seen him truly smile?  
“I assure you it was Severus.”  
There was silence followed by some shuffling and Sirius strained to hear what was happening beyond the door.  
“Careful wolf, your face is likely to freeze like that. Come here, let me see you.”  
More shuffling and then Remus gasped,  
“Merlin Severus, your hands are like ice! You spend far too much time in the dungeon avoiding sunlight.”  
Deciding he’d heard enough, and dying to know what they were doing, Sirius kicked the door open the rest of the way and strode boldly into the room.  
His eyes sought Remus’ in the well lit space and his heart fell once more when the other man avoided his gaze. Steeling himself Sirius mentally stepped back and surveyed the scene in front of him. Remus was sat in a high back chair with Snape practically in his lap, his pale, grubby hands splayed across the auburn haired man’s face with chilling familiarity. On the table beside them sat two goblets, both empty.  
“I do hope I’m not interrupting.”  
He spoke caustically, guilt slamming into him again when Remus flinched at his tone and words. It was Snape who eventually answered him, seemingly unperturbed at being caught doing whatever-it-was with Remus.  
“Not at all Black, we’re just finishing up. So good of you to come back, I must say I for one wasn’t expecting you to finish brooding quite so soon.”  
Sirius growled low in his throat, and didn’t stop until Snape had removed his hands from Remus’ face and sat back in his own chair. Remus for his part seemed set on ignoring him as he helped Severus gather up several empty vials and various herbs.  
“Thank you Severus, I’ll see you soon.”  
Snape nodded briskly,  
“Two days time Lupin. I’ll be in touch.”  
***  
Finding himself alone with Remus, Sirius floundered for a moment, wondering what to say, trying to choose his words carefully and not start another argument. Unfortunately for him, his jealously overcame his common sense.  
“What was all that then? I didn’t realize you and Snape were so cozy.”  
Suddenly feeling very tired Remus was barely able to refrain from rolling his eyes.  
“Don’t be stupid Sirius.”  
If he hadn’t been so tired, the result of tossing and turning in a painfully empty bed and two tantrums from Dani that morning, first when she’d realized Sirius wasn’t there to wake her up, and again when he missed breakfast, Remus probably would’ve said something a little more tactful. As it was, it was definitely the wrong thing to say, and Sirius didn’t receive it well.  
“Sorry, sorry. Shall I leave again so you can call him back? I would’ve stayed out longer if I’d known you were entertaining guests. Go on, floo the slimy bastard. I’ll just make myself scarce so you two can get back to your groping.”  
Remus wasn’t just tired anymore, he was exhausted. Sirius was exhausting and childish and million other things that weren’t at all complimentary.  
“For Merlin’s sake, Sirius! Are you even listening to yourself? As if I’d cheat on you, with Severus of all people—who barely tolerates me as it is, thanks to that stupid prank you pulled sixth year.”  
“Well you looked pretty close just now, fuck’s sake Remus he was practically in your lap. Had his sweaty hands all over you! Don’t think I didn’t hear you complaining about how insensitive I am either. ‘Oh it was Severus, it was terrible’.”  
He said in a mocking tone. Unaware or uncaring of the fact that he was pushing the werewolf well past his limit.  
Remus stood quickly, eyes flashing red as he lunged forward, barely catching himself in time to take a deep breath before he spat back,  
“I cannot believe you! You’re acting like a complete idiot. For your information Sirius, Severus was here as a favor to Dumbledore. He’s been working on the wolfsbane potion, and I volunteered to be his test subject. If you’d pull your head out of your arse for two bloody seconds, youd’ve realized he’s been here several times over the last two weeks to give me the potions!”  
The following silence was deafening. Sirius hadn’t thought he could feel like more of an arse, especially after the previous night, but he did. And he should, he supposed. Remus was right, he was being a twat. What was it those Muggle psychology books Lily had always been poring over had said, oh right, he was “projecting”.  
Sirius swallowed past the lump in his throat, holding both hands out in what he hoped was a placating, non-threatening way, and took a deep breath.  
“I’m sorry.”  
Sighing loudly Remus turned away,  
“Sirius—”  
“No Moony, I mean it. I’m so, so sorry. I’ve been an arse lately. I’m having a hard time adjusting—and I know that’s no excuse but please, can you forgive me?”  
Still facing away, Remus’ voice was quiet and strained,  
“I know it’s been difficult for you Padfoot, but it hasn’t exactly been easy for us either. It’s been especially hard on Dani, and now there’s Harry to worry about. You’ve been so moody lately; I never know what will set you off. I just don’t know what to say anymore, because I obviously can’t make it better.”  
Cautiously stepping closer, Sirius placed a tentative hand on his lover’s shoulder. He was incredibly tense and trembling slightly. With a jolt that ran straight to his heart, Sirius realized the next full moon was a little less than a week away. Guilt slammed into him like a brick wall once again, and he wondered—not for the first time, why Remus bothered to put up with him.  
“I know love, I know. Merlin, I’ve made a mess of things.  
Wrapping the auburn haired man in his arms, feeling ridiculously relieved that Remus didn’t pull away or tell him to sod off, Sirius continued with his apology.  
“Look, I know saying that I’m sorry doesn’t actually fix things, but I am. I am so very, very sorry Moony. I can’t promise when, but things will get better. I’m trying and I will try harder. I know I need to work through some things, and with your help I can.”  
In spite of the little voice in the back of his head telling him to pull away, ignore Sirius’ plea and look out for himself for once, Remus couldn’t help relaxing into his lover’s embrace.  
Feeling Remus lean into him, Sirius breathed a quiet sigh of relief. They could fix this. He could fix this.  
Pressing a tender kiss just below the werewolf’s ear, Sirius spoke in a whisper,  
“I’m sorry. Forgive me?”  
Remus’ lips twitched a little in a sad approximation of a smile and he turned in Sirius’ arms until they stood facing each other.  
“I forgive you Padfoot, but please, promise me you’ll talk to me. Or if not me, someone.”  
Nodding his head earnestly Sirius placed gentle kisses all along Moony’s unshaven jaw. The scratchy stubble beneath his lips was unbelievably real, grounding him in the here and now. Remus’ smile chased away the lingering shadows in the corners of Sirius’ mind and he leaned in to plant a firm kiss on the shorter man’s lips.  
Clutching at Sirius’ robes, Remus surrendered himself to the kiss. Opening his mouth to allow Sirius’ probing tongue to enter, meeting him halfway. It was tender and slow, their mouths sliding together lazily and unhurried.  
Breaking the kiss, Sirius rested his forehead against Remus’, basking in his nearness. They stood together for several long moments before Sirius spoke, breaking the easy silence that had enveloped the pair in the empty house.  
“I hate to mention it Moony love, but you taste dreadful.”  
Remus chuckled, half-heartedly swatting Sirius on the shoulder.  
“It’s the herbal rinse Severus gave me to wash down his latest creation, it tastes nearly as bad as the potion itself. Sorry.”  
“It’s alright Moons, don’t apologize. I’m sorry for accusing you of—you know, with Snape.”  
Sirius replied, hugging his Moony tighter to him. Remus hummed in agreement, gracefully accepting the apology. There was another short lapse in conversation before Remus finally said,  
“I do hate to mention it Padfoot, but you smell like a distillery met up with a dumpster from an alley behind a Muggle club”.  
“Oi, I get the picture. Er, sorry though. I think I may have slept in the alley behind the Three Broomstick’s last night, now that you mention it.”  
Remus nodded sagely,  
“That would explain your unusual—odor. You really could do with a shower.”  
Grinning cheekily Sirius responded,  
“Only if you join me”.  
***  
Stepping out of the fireplace, face smudged with floo powder, Dora took off toward her bedroom eager to owl her friends and tell them she’d finished the last of her school shopping. She’d be starting Hogwarts in less than a week and she couldn’t wait.  
Next out of the fireplace was Dromeda holding a squirming Dani, although she’d insisted she was fine before they’d left The Ministry, the three year old desperately needed the loo. Heading that way, hoping to avoid an accident, Dromeda called after her daughter,  
“Dora be sure to hang up your new robes, don’t just leave them on the floor—don’t want them getting wrinkled!”  
“Kay mum!”  
Dora hollered back, rolling her eyes as she searched for her inkwell.  
They’d spent the better part of the morning in Diagon Alley, buying Dora’s school supplies and showing Harry a bit more of the Wizarding World. The child had been fascinated by nearly everything, taking in the shops and their patrons with wide brown eyes obscured by light brown hair, courtesy of some handy spellwork on Ted’s behalf. It wasn’t safe to bring Harry Potter back to the public eye, but a little brunette with brown eyes and no scar in sight roused no one’s suspicions. If asked they would all be truthful but vague, he was their cousin and was staying with them at present.  
News of Sirius Black’s innocence had spread quickly but not received much attention by the mainstream of Wizarding society. The Potters were still dead, The Boy Who Lived had been hidden away and there was little interest in the disgraced Black Heir now that the drama of him having taken up with an eccentric Wizard from a poor family and fathered an illegitimate child had blown over. ** Occasionally there would be whispers following them but people would gossip about anything really. They could have just as easily been talking about Dora’s randomly changing hair or Ted’s taste in ties as they could Black’s bastard heir or the mysterious appearance of a brown haired child.  
In any case none of the children ever seemed to notice the scrutiny. Dora had bumped into several of her friends at Flourish and Blots and promptly taken off with them promising to meet outside the Ministry in half an hour and Dani had thrown a tantrum outside of Gringotts when Harry had gotten to hold Andromeda’s hand instead of her. A quiet word from her Aunt had stopped the toddler’s frustrated tears and she’d managed a watery smile while apologizing and hugging Harry tightly.  
Harry liked the Wizarding World. It was so colorful and full of noise and energy. The few times he’d been allowed to go out with his Aunt and Uncle and Dudley the shops had been dull and full of rude people. And Harry was always getting scolded not to touch anything even though he didn’t and Dudley ran around pulling things from shelves. The shops in Diagon Alley were nothing like he’d ever seen before. There were toys that moved on their own, books that spoke and had colorful moving pictures, there were strangely dressed people and funny looking animals everywhere he looked. It was marvelous! It was also a bit much and Harry was relieved to be back in the comforting quiet of his new home.

**my headcanon for this verse: Mpreg is more common among Werewolves because of their altered biology, but regular Wizards can also carry children with the aid of spells and potions. I did tag for Mpreg**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ch. 6 is off to a very slow start, but I'm still mostly on track so yay!


	5. Chapter Five: Observations

Dani scrunched her eyes until they were tiny slits, squinting at Harry across the table top. He was working on a drawing with crayons, squinting his eyes a little as he leaned back to see his work. Tightening her grip on her own crayon, Dani copied his movements, leaning away from her drawing and squinting at it some more.

Putting down his paper, Sirius watched his daughter and godson with fascination.

“Dani, what are you doing love?”

The little girl shrugged, sending her father a wide smile,

“I’m drawing like Harry, Daddy” she said as though it were the most obvious thing in the world.

Nodding slowly, Sirius smiled back, turning his attention back to Harry who was still coloring away, heedless of the topic of conversation.

“Right, ‘course you are” mused Sirius, it always surprised and amazed him when his daughter—and yeah, that was still a bit mind boggling as well—did something that was so utterly Remus, while saying something that was so utterly _him._ If her features and coloring didn’t immediately clue you in to whom Dani’s parents were her mannerisms were a dead giveaway.

She was so like Remus, the way she ate and spoke. But she was like him too. When Dani was excited, her entire being would vibrate with an abundance of energy that Remus assures him, she didn’t get from her werewolf parent. She was naturally curious, like Remus, but had Sirius’ mischievous streak and fierce competitive nature. Sirius felt humbled that the child he’d never before met, never dared dream of, loved him so deeply, and was _like_ him. She was a part of him, of them both. And he was amazed by the sheer amount of love he felt in return for the small child.

And then there was Harry. He might look just like James at first glance, but he had Lily’s eyes, and from what Sirius had seen, Lily’s levelheadedness and gentle nature. When he smiled, it was James’ smile, and Lily’s sparkling eyes. It hurt, it was a raw opened wound, but beyond the pain the deaths of his closest friends brought, he found joy in their son. Because yes, it hurt beyond words to see Harry smile, so much like both his parents, knowing he’d never know them, and that they never really had a chance to know him. But Harry was a part of them, and he was so alive. Harry would live and be loved, James and Lily were dead they wouldn’t get to see Harry grow up, but Sirius was still alive and he planned to be around for the rest of Harry’s life.

The boy’s soft voice brought Sirius back from his thoughts, “Whaddaya think Uncle Padfoot?”

Glancing down, Sirius took a good look at the drawing. It was of two houses, the one on the left was small and dark, with four figures standing in front of it. There were three people all standing together, a tall woman wearing a grey-bluish dress next to a very rounded man wearing white shirt and smaller, also very round figure with bright yellow hair. Off the side, was a small boy with black hair and a frown. The house to the right was bright and colorful, boasting a purple roof and bright orange shutters. There was a cluster of people standing in front of the second house, all dressed in bright colors, and right in the middle of them all was a small figure with black hair and huge smile taking up his entire circle face.

Sirius felt tears pricking the backs of his eyes and quickly swiped them away.

“It’s lovely Harry, well done! We should show Remus and put it up on the fridge, or do you want to put it up in your bedroom?”

Harry smiled broadly, but his answer was lost beneath Dani’s excited voice.

“It pretty Harry! Look at mine Daddy, look at mine now!”

Sirius smiled, picking up Dani’s paper with gentle hands. It was a lot colorful squiggles, with smiling faces adorned with varying lengths of black and blond hair to one side.

“Beautiful! Good job love!”

Remus walked into the kitchen to refill his teacup, pausing when Sirius called him over.

“Moony my love, did you realized what talented artists we have in the family?”

The werewolf moved closer to examine the art. Dani’s picture brought a bright smile to his face, standing in stark relief against the deep shadows under his eyes, but Harry’s drawing had his eyes welling up with hot tears. Embarrassed, Remus wiped them on his sleeve and gave both kids a one armed hug. His hormones were always a little wobbly near the full and the potions Severus had him taking seemed to make it worse to both their dismay.

“Talented indeed. They’re beautiful, honestly. We really ought to frame them.”

With another smile he excused himself to the sitting room, needing a moment to gather himself. He could feel Sirius’ concerned gaze even as the door swung shut behind him. The full moon was tomorrow night and he was already beginning to feel the familiar itch beneath his skin. On the one hand, the transitions had been easier since Sirius’ return. On the other, the wolf was still angry at its mate’s long absence and would become restless and violent. The first two full moons after their reunion, Remus and Severus had agreed to put the research on hold, unsure how the wolf would react to Sirius’ sudden presence after so long. This cycle they had resumed the trials. Previously the potion had left him exhausted and too lethargic to do much more than snarl and bite at any part of himself he could easily reach. With his latest changes to the formula, Severus was hoping the werewolf would be more docile than incapacitated during the change and not stuck in bed for days afterward recovering his strength and healing from self inflicted wounds.

Remus was feeling cautiously optimistic despite his worries about shielding Harry from his change. Dani knew already, of course. She didn’t truly understand it but she’d been made aware when she grew old enough to ask questions. Harry was still adjusting to the notion of magic existing, settling into a new place with all new people. He seemed to be doing very well, but he was such a quiet and reserved child, Remus thought they may not really know until he finally had a meltdown. In any case, Severus was a brilliant Potions Master and Remus was hoping tomorrow night would offer a breakthrough in his research.

***

Severus Snape collapsed wearily into a high back lounge chair in the Tonks’ sitting room. It was only seven am but he felt as though he’d been awake for days. This latest trial of the Wolfsbane potion had been… unsuccessful. Lupin had been the complete opposite of docile and had spent the better part of the night throwing himself bodily into the Magically reinforced walls of the cellar beneath the garden shed. The wolf had been confused and vicious, scratching at the walls, the dog animagus keeping him company, and himself. Snarling and howling and doing his best to escape. Padfoot had been able to distract him for small patches of time, engaging him in wrestling matches and getting Moony to chase him around the limited space offered in the cellar but for the most part the wolf had been inconsolable.

After transforming back into a shuddering, exhausted human, Remus had haltingly explained that Moony was worried about the cubs and had been trying to get to them. He’d been very confused and then angry when he’d realized his cubs were locked away from him.

Severus had made a note of the adverse reaction on a bit of parchment and quickly begun trying to discover which ingredient had brought on the change in behavior. 'Had it been the ingredient itself or the amount in which it was used… it had probably been the Antimony-'

His thought process was rudely interrupted when Sirius, recently transformed back to human and wearing only his underwear, grabbed him by the collar and attempted to drag him from his seat. Trying to keep up with the distressed Moony all night had taken its toll though, and Sirius’s strength was waning. Severus shrugged him off with a huff and raised a haughty eyebrow.

“Sit down before you fall down, Black. Pummeling me won’t get us any closer to perfecting the potion. This is only a minor setback.”

“ _Minor_ setback? Fucking look at him, Snape, I haven’t seen him this bad off since third year before we figured out the animagus transformation!”

Severus glared at the black haired man, “I have. I’ve seen him after he’s torn himself to near ribbons, throat bloody and raw from screaming for his mate”.

It was a low blow, aimed to hurt, but Severus was exhausted and Black was not helping the situation in the slightest. Sirius staggered back as though he’d been physically hit and sunk into a chair across from the dying fire.

“I…”

Sirius had nothing to say to that and Severus was momentarily grateful for the silence.

“Lupin will recover, I will discover what went wrong with this potion and we will try again next month. This is not the worst shape he’s been in after a trial and before this, the potion has been steadily improving. Patience, Black, is required at this point of the process. We are in uncharted territory.”

Sirius snorted derisively, “A good excuse is still just an excuse Snape. Your potion didn’t work, and I don’t know that Remus will be testing any more for your _research”._ The last was said with as much disdain and Sirius could pack into a single word.

Severus smiled a touch smugly, “I don’t believe that’s your decision to make Black. Lupin agreed to do these trials long before your return. We have been working on this potion for over a year. I won’t give up, and neither will Remus.”

Sirius grits his teeth at yet another reminder of the things he’d missed during his imprisonment. It hadn’t been his choice to be arrested for the murder of his best friends, half mad from grief and anger, unable to speak in his defense.

‘But if you hadn’t gone off half-cocked, let your anger get the best of you and chased Peter into the night… maybe things would’ve turned out differently’ the darker corners of his conscience hissed at him.

***

Remus crept slowly toward consciousness to the sounds of children’s laughter. Blinking blearily he cracked open his eyes, and waiting a moment for his vision to settle and clear, glanced around to find the source of the noise. Dani was sprawled on her stomach on the end of their bed, a Muggle children’s book open in front of her. It was a hidden door book about a lost puppy that she absolutely adored; it’d been a Christmas gift from Dora if his memory was correct. Every time she lifted a cardboard flap she’d giggle in delight. Whispering voices sounded on his left and Remus carefully turned, mindful of his stiff muscles, to see Sirius sat in the chair next to the bed, a worried looking Harry in his lap.

“Good morning beautiful,” Sirius said with a small wink, feeling gratified by the color the faint blush brought to Remus’ complexion. “See Harry, I told you Moony is alright. Remember we talked about how Moony gets sick sometimes and then he needs to rest for a bit?”

Harry nodded shakily, looking a little unsure, green eyes brimming with worry and fear. Dani chose that moment to fling herself at Papa, stopping just short of wrapping her arms around his neck when she remembered. ‘Gentle, gentle hugs for Papa when he’s resting.’

Gingerly, the three year old gave Remus a hug then thrust her board book in his face. “Look Papa! I found Spot!”

Wincing a little at the volume, Remus managed a smile. “That’s wonderful pup, well done.”

Dani beamed, “Harry can you read with me now?”

Harry looked hesitant then twisted around to whisper in Sirius’ ear. The man grinned and stood from his chair, lifting Harry to hover over Remus on the bed. Harry gave him the gentlest of hugs, whispering “I hope you feel better soon Moony” against the werewolf’s neck. Remus smiled, genuinely happy and kissed him on the cheek before Sirius deposited Harry on the end of the bed to read with Dani.

Sitting next to his mate on the bed, Sirius reached for his hands, “Was a bad one last night Moony. Remus I—I hate seeing you like that, are you sure—”

Whatever he was going to say next was lost in the brisk knock on the bedroom door. Without waiting for a reply Severus swung the door open and entered the bedroom, eyes flicking across faces to linger on Harry’s before settling on Remus.

“Good morning Severus” Remus called, interestedly eying the cup of tea the Potions master was holding.

“Good afternoon Lupin,” Severus returned a bit teasingly causing the werewolf to glance at the clock. Afternoon indeed. It was nearly three pm. Handing the tea off to Black, Snape glanced at Harry once more before addressing Remus.

“I believe I have discovered what went wrong with the last potion. I have already begun to draw up a list of suitable ingredients to properly balance out the Antimony. Fluxweed should do quite nicely. I do apologize Lupin, I know last night was a disappointment.”

Remus was gratefully sipping the warm tea with Sirius’ help and waived off the apology. “No apology necessary Severus, I knew this could happen when I agreed to these trials. And before this last cycle things were looking up. I have every faith that you will succeed.”

Sirius muttered something under his breath and Remus bit back a sigh and made a note to speak with Sirius later. Severus looked about to comment on Sirius’ rudeness when Dani jumped at him from the bed. A little surprised but having some experience with Dani Sneak Attacks, Severus quickly brought his arms up to catch the girl.

“Hello Mr. Snape” the child grinned up at him. Black’s impish smile softened by Remus’ kind eyes was an utterly disarming combination. Severus suppressed a smile.

“Hello Ms. Lupin-Black”.

Dani giggled at being addressed to formally and squirmed to be set down. Severus complied and she bounced back over to Harry who was squinting at a page of the board book. Severus tilted his head in contemplation.

“Hello Harry, I’m not certain that you remember me, but we’ve met before.”

Harry looked up from the book and offered an uncertain smile. Nodding he answered, “Sometimes you visit Mr. Moony. He says you’re making him better. Are you a doctor?”

“No exactly, but I am trying to make Re—Moony better, rest assured.”

Harry smiled, a full on smile, and Severus’ breath caught. To see Lily’s smile and Lily’s eyes on Potter’s face would never be easy, the boy went back to squinting at his book and Severus amended his previous thought. ‘Lily’s eyes with James’ eyesight. The boy obviously needed glasses’.

“Did you know Harry, that your mum was my best friend in school?”

Harry looked up, suddenly much more interested in the odd man dressed all in black. “Really?”

Severus gave a genuine smile, “Yes, and you remind me very much of her. One of her favorite things to do was read. Tell me Harry, do you like to read?”

Harry nodded, but his smile had become uncertain. “I—I try to read but sometimes I can’t make the letters make words. Uncle Vernon said it’s because I’m not smart like Dudley, but Dudley doesn’t know his numbers as well as I do.”

Severus glanced at Lupin and Black, they both looked concerned and Black looked angry. ‘Good,’ Severus thought, ‘at the very least, the boy will be well cared for’.

“I wouldn’t worry too much about what your Uncle Vernon used to say Harry. I think you’re very bright. As much as you remind me of your mother, you are also your father’s child. Did you know that your father wore eyeglasses?”

Harry nodded, he’d seen his dad wearing glasses in all the photos Moony and Padfoot had given him. “You think I need glasses too? Like my dad?”

The idea seemed to please the little boy very much, and Severus nodded, “Yes Harry, I believe you do. It seems quite obvious to me.”

The last was obviously a jibe at Sirius and Remus, but they were content to ignore it. They simply lacked the energy to respond. Harry needing glasses didn’t come as a surprise. Sirius had been wondering about it since he’d noticed the boy squinting the other morning; he recognized the behavior from the multitude of times James had lost or broken his glasses. He hoped Remus remembered that charm Lily had come up with to locate and protect the things.

TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay!  
> While working on this today I realized that leaving everything so vague timeline wise, has begun to come back to bite me. I'm hoping I can work out the next few chapters without having to go back and edit previous parts so bare with me. I have a few interludes and more chapters planned for this part of the series, after which I plan to work on other projects before staring part 3 of the Cosmos 'verse. 
> 
> Thanks for all the kudos and comments :)

**Author's Note:**

> Con-crit is always welcome, kudos make me smile :)  
> i need tumblr followers- http://jedimonkeyspock.tumblr.com/


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